Many Malaysian Thais are close to their relatives in Thailand although many others have severed their ties with their Thai ancestry. The customs, traditions and religious festivals of the Malaysian Thais may have originated from Thailand. Hence, differences exist between the customs practiced by the Thai community in Malaysia and the Thai community in Thailand.

Visiting

During visiting, guests and hosts will exchange greetings by saying “sawasdi”, palms together under the chin and head slightly bowed. When greeting older people, hands must be lifted to a higher level. Non Thai visitors however who want to familiarize themselves with the way of greeting can just say the host’s name politely.

Before entering the house the visitor must take off his shoes at the door or foot of the stairs unless the host allows him to enter with his shoes on. If other visitors are present at the same time, greetings and introduction should be exchanged. If the new guest needs to pass in front or behind the existing guests, it is best for the new guest to bow his head slightly as a sign of respect while saying, “Excuse me, I would like to pass.”, on his way to an appropriate seating place.

Birth

When the news of a birth is announced by the family, relatives and friends will visit to congratulate them. They will normally bring gifts or presents for the newborn.

It is however considered improper to visit at dusk. Newborns are not usually brought out during this time and great care is taken to ensure he does not cry at this time. Malaysian Thais do not quite like having their babies praised with the words “beautiful” or “cute”, or if the word “heavy” is used to describe a plump baby. Instead, phrases such as “This baby is so ugly.” or “I hate looking at him.” are acceptable.

Seven days after the birth, a special ceremony is held called “naik buaian” (going in the cradle), to celebrate the birth of the baby. Glutinous rice will be prepared to be distributed to family and friends. The baby’s hair will be shorn and he will be brought to a ceremony called “memijak tanah” (stepping on soil) on the same day. However, this is no longer fully practiced by some parents.

Marriage

Malaysian Thais are very particular about the day and the time to hold the marriage ceremony. This is to ensure the well-being of the newlyweds. Suitable date and time will be determined after consulting the Thai almanac, the Thai monks, priests or others who are experts in this field.

A Malaysian Thai wedding ceremony varies from place to place. However the ceremonies which are normally done are as follows:

· The marriage ceremony is done usually at the bride’s home, and is conducted by a priest.

• When the marriage ceremony begins, the bride and groom will pray in a special location, to pray to Lord Buddha to oversee the wedding and bless the marriage and wellbeing of the newlyweds.
• After the prayers ceremony the bride and groom will then sit with their legs folded under them, bowing their heads and sitting on a specially prepared cushion or low stool, with their hands linked.
• The priestess will then place a special necklace made of a silk thread over the heads of the bride and groom respectively. The two necklaces will then be linked to a piece of thread, which will signify their union as husband and wife. This is followed by a declaration by the priestess that the marriage is valid according to Thai custom. The priestess will recite advice and the rules of marriage to the newlyweds so that they can live together in harmony to the end of their lives.
• Specially invited monks will then recite the prayers for wellbeing while sprinkling the prayer water and flowers on the couple.
• This is then followed by the ceremony of pouring the prayer water, which is first poured into a “Hoai Sang” (a type of shell) before being poured onto the linked hands of the newlyweds. This ceremony is begun by the newlywed’s parents, followed by the elders, family as well as invited guests. Congratulation messages as well as wishes for their happiness must be conveyed to the newlyweds while the ceremony takes place.
• To close the marriage ceremony mass prayers will again be done with the priests reciting Buddhist prayers of well wishes.
• Dinner will be served at night.

Death

On receiving news about a death, relatives and friends will pay their respects and give their condolences to the family of the deceased. The Thai community has certain customs to be observed in dealing with death. Taking care of matters for the death can be done either at the deceased’s home or at a “Wat” (Temple). However, for those who died by accident or were killed (considered to have died improperly) then their bodies will be managed at the “Wat” and cannot be brought home.

Before being placed in a coffin, the body must be bathed. The deceased will be dressed with the clothes turned back to front. Both the big toes and thumbs will be tied together with a silk thread. Both hands will be placed palms down on the chest, with fingers interlaced as if in prayer. A candle, three joss sticks and a tied flower will be placed behind the ear to open the doors to the afterworld.

Once the body is placed in the coffin, monks will be invited to pray.

According to the Thai community’s belief, the body of an adult will be cremated to release the spirit from the body. However the body of a pregnant mother, of children and of victims of accidents or being killed must be buried.

The cremation ceremony is usually done at the “Wat” or at the cemetery. As many relatives and friends of the deceased are encouraged to come to the cremation area. The wood required for the ceremony will be arranged in seven layers and the coffin will be placed above this. Before the cremation begins, the monks will recite prayers for the soul to be able to leave easily. Priests will then circle the coffin three times before starting the ceremony. Family members, relatives and those presents will then light the wood using a joss-stick and a fragrant piece of wood which they have brought. Those who are leaving the cremation area must not invite others to follow but must simply slip out quietly. If anything is left at the cremation area, they cannot turn back to get it. Once at home, they must wash their feet, hands and face before entering the house.

Three days after the body is cremated, the deceased’s family will collect the uncremated bones and remains from the cremation location. The remains will be cleaned, sprinkled with perfume and put in a special container to be kept at a selected location at the “Wat”. These places keeping the remains are called “Bua” and the family can pray for the soul there at any time. On the night of collecting the remains, monks will be invited to read prayers at the house to hinder from any bad fortune.